Thinking about blogging on the daily. Whatever I am thinking or feeling, just to type it into words might help. Who the hell knows at this point.
Still having trouble sleeping. Since the hardcore weather has set in, my body is on fire. My biggest fear is using up my CBD oil as I know once it is gone, it is gone. I can't afford to be buying it. Since his job position changed at the beginning of the year, he will no longer be making bonus. That is money that we will be missing out on each month. My doctor does give me dilaudid(only a few at a time) but I don't want to get "hooked" on them. Highly doubt that would happen. I only have one left from the last time she gave them to me.
Today I have been incredibly nauseous. I just took my Zofran and hope that kicks in quickly. It's never ending. It's always something. Being chronically ill can suck my dick!
Yesterday I received some disheartening news. My insurance denied my claim to have my upper teeth removed. I feel like I keep hitting a brick wall. The place that I wanted to go to for therapy is booked solid. Bec did say she talked to management and explained my disease and situation, so fingers crossed on that one.
I managed to do the dishes, fold a load of laundry and do another load. My body is done. I am done. I told him I am not doing anymore today. Ya know, god forbid I get any help around here.
Trying to stay positive through it all.
I know the feeling.....I've been slacking since my latest surgery in October. I finally just told him last week and told "the ladies" last week. I can't keep up. The litter boxes have got to get done this week.....it's been so rough. And to not have help, I totally understand. Then I feel bad for feeling bad about "he could help" bc he is working and I am not. He pays for almost everything and I throw in 2 cents once in a while. But it's hard. Dishes, Laundry, Pet Care, plus other "upkeep" stuff. I totally get it. You are not alone.
ReplyDeleteAlthough we all have our own personal battles, I have to commend you, for being as strong as you are, and always getting through whatever life throws at you. Hang in there. You will see better days. Love you.
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